Watching from a distance - Moxiety
by Cardigans and Hoodies
Summary: Patton would watch from a distance, feeling and absorbing the emotions from everyone that happened to walk past his hiding place... Until one day he felt a strong and overwhelming feeling of hate, anxiety and a scent of the glorious, crimson nectar all belonging to an angsty teen named Virgil. Watching from a distance wasn't an option for him anymore...
1. Prologue

**_Monster._**

_It's just a word to most people. A word that describes something, or someone that is evil, cruel and abnormal. Something that is considered mythical, not real. Part of the imagination. A word children are scared of when they ask their parents to look under their beds or in their closets. _

_Monster is a word. _

_Monster means so much more. _

_To Patton, the words Monster describes him. It makes him feel dirty, ugly and evil. It makes him feel absolutely disgusted at himself for something he can't help being. _

_To Virgil, the word Monster means Monster. It's just a word to him. He has learned to live with how people view him. Virgil has learned to deal with his demons. _

_Patton on the other hand... is exactly what the word means. _

_Patton is a **Monster. **_

_Patton is a **Vampire.**_


	2. Hidden by the trees

Trees of auburn, mint and sunshine yellow, cast shadows over the small clearing in which something lurks. Hidden by the trees, buried deep within the shadows, and invisible in the darkness as humans stroll past his hideaway, Patton watches. His freakish eyes of liquid red stare out toward the town, curiosity and wonder flickering through them. Head tilted, eyes blinking, Patton lets out a sigh, yearning to be apart of their world.

Despite the fact blood filled bodies, and some even in metal monsters with lights, Patton can see them so clearly. Watching how each individual rushes to where they need to be, brushing past others, wafting their scent closer to the vampire that is loitering in the trees like some sort of wild animal.

Steering away the urge of temptation, Patton forces down the thirst within his burning throat with a large gulp. Blood and pain still stain him. His pale, yet freckled hands shine with a hint of faded crimson. Memories and emotions he can't seem to get rid of after his kill three weeks ago. The kill that caused him and his victim so much torture, so much agony.

Blood has never been a problem for Patton. It's the stalking. The killing of his unwilling sacrifice, who is later turned into nothing more than a corpse for someone else to find.

It's the killing that hurts Patton the most.

It's the agony of feeling someone else's pain as if it were your own, burning you from the inside out. The spine tingling fear, screams that sound like a death sentence in themselves. The chorus of plea's -

_Please don't hurt me. _

**_Her fear was now his. _**

_Let me go. _

**_Her struggle was now his. _**

_I won't tell anyone if you leave me alone. _

**_Her anxiety was now his. _**

_Just… please… stop… _

**_Her last breath, her gut wrenching pain, her numbness. _**

**_Were now his. _**

Those. Those are the things that torture Patton's mind and deadened soul. Those are the nightmares that flood his head with a sea of anguish, that he wishes he could just delete. Empty his mind to bring back some of his sanity… some of his innocence… Bring back something he had lost a long time ago. His purity is gone, dead, just like his soul. And all because he was a bloodthirsty monster.

Monsters are not part of society. They can never involve themselves in the world of humans, not unless their intentions are to feed from them. Patton had never agreed to any of this. But Patton is just one Vampire, and his council would never agree to his plea's of letting him free to join the humans… even for a little while.

So this is why he watches. Watching from a distance is not ideal for him, but it's something at least. It helps him pretend that he is one of them. That he is part of their world… That he feels like he is somewhere he _should_ belong… even when he's not.

_"No, Rem! I don't want to get involved in this!"_ Patton's head shoots up, locks of mousy brown hair falling into curls to obscure his eyes. His ears focusing on the sound of anger filled words, yet the voice they belong to seems so smooth and light.

_"C'mon, all ya gotta do is pretend. Until the party, that's all." _This voice is more laid back, almost lazy, sleepy, even. Patton watches from afar as the one speaking steps a few feet closer to the smaller male, who is buried in an oversized purple hoodie.

_"And I said no." _

_"Do you wanna to go or not? 'Cause we can't without an invite… I mean, not unless you wanna crash it..." _ They wave a small paper cup up for emphasis before taking a large gulp from it.

There is a long pause, Patton staring intently as the scene unfolds right in front of his blood red eyes. A party? What was one of those? What did they do? How did they work? The questions flooding through Patton's mind cease their swimming as soon as the 'Cute Hoodied Human' speaks up.

_"We are not crashing a party, Remy! And I'm not going to pretend to like someone just to get an invite!" _

A frown spreads across Patton's, pale and freckled features as he continues to watch the encounter between the two humans. His dead heart would have been beating to an inch of its life if it could right now. Just the thought of someone pretending to fall in love with someone else makes Patton's stomach twirl into something awful. It's like his intestines have decided to tie and tangle themselves together into a metre of knots and loops.

_"He won't know unless you tell him you're pretending." _The male Patton knows as 'Rem, or Remy,' continues to reason with the other, taking another sip from the paper cup.

_"Then why don't you do it if it's that easy?!" _

Patton sees one of Remy's eyebrows peak from over dark glasses, throwing an arm up in exasperation. Patton can tell that he's not exactly happy about this just as much as the other human is. He can feel it. Feel the doubt seeping into his own stomach, burying itself further into the very pit of it, like a bug burrowing inside of it… just as it does with Remy.

_"You know that I'm not the one Roman likes…"_ The words slip from Remy's lips with ease, almost shrugging it off.

The Vampire watches as the 'Cute Hoodied Human' steps closer to the other male, jaw clenching, eyes like smoke and ash as he stares at the taller male. _"Fine. But if he figures out I'm using him… I'm done." _

Remy's lips turn up and into a thin smirk. _"He likes you, don't worry." _

Patton watches as Remy walks off into the opposite direction that they had both came in. Leaving the other human… The 'Hoodied Human,' behind to stew in their own thoughts and feelings. Patton can feel nothing but an eruption of self-hate. Like rusted daggers twisting in his belly. Chills creeping up his already dead, and cold skin.

_Patton can feel it. _

**_His Self loathing now becomes Patton's. _**

_Patton can feel everything. _

**_His Anxiety and guilt now become Patton's._**

_And that's why it hurts._

Because Patton can feel it… Feel _him._

* * *

The trees cast darker shadows as the sun starts to disappear behind the clouds, but still, Patton watches. Watches until his eyes bleed from too much staring.

He watches.

He feels.

He hurts.

The Hoodied Human sits not far from Patton's hiding place. They have been there for a little under an hour, sitting, staring just as hard as Patton has. Watching. But this is different, and Patton can't help but wonder why the human is there, slumped on a wooden bench in the middle of the park.

It's almost as if Patton could stretch his hand out and touch the human, that is only a few feet away from his hiding spot. A smile spreads slowly across Patton's grey lips, stretching so that one of his fangs rests oddly on top of his bottom lip. It's only when fingers colder than ice rest themselves on his shoulders, that the smile on his lips fades into nothing but a straight line.

"What are you doing out here?" His voice is sickly smooth, almost like when you've eaten too much ice cream you can't take any more of its sugary-goodness.

"W-watching…" Patton whispers, eyes never leaving the human.

"We've talked about this, Patton. You can't keep going out without my permission."

That's when Patton's eyes flicker upward, landing on the pale, disfigured skin of his master. His only friend. "I'm sorry, Decan… I-I was just…"

Decan's fingers squeeze themselves around Patton's shoulder, hard, until the young Vampire lets out a whimper. "I need you to understand that Humans are dangerous! You know you can't keep wandering off into Wonder-Human-Land."

"I'm s-sorry… I won't do it again…" Patton lets out another strained whimper, biting his lip to keep from being too loud. His eyes trail back over to the Human… the one without a name. The one with swirls and roses painted up their neck, hidden by a purple hood.

That's what he'll think about.

That's what will keep him sane.

The Cute Hoodied Human.


	3. Yes, Master

**Ahh, I am so sorry for how long this has taken! Also sorry for how short this chapter is... **

**Thank you to everyone following/favouriting/reviewing, means the world to me! :) **

* * *

Groans of disgruntlement and a powerful wave of pure disappointment drag Patton out of his daze. His eyes no longer hold that sparkling flare of curiosity, tearing his gaze away from the inconsistent gaps between the trees. Instead, he forces himself to stare up at the angered irises of his master, the rigid set of scars across his face slowly become unbearable to look at. It makes Janus' presence darker somehow, intimidating. It wasn't hard to wonder why others often felt wary of him. They were right to.

"You disobeyed me again," Janus sneers, his freshly shined shoes take a few steps closer. He slides a gloved hand under Patton's chin, fingers curling, to roughly yank him forward without a hint of warning.

"I-I'm sorry, Master! I —"

"You think this is acceptable?" Janus reinforces his grip, earning nothing but a pathetic bubble of whimpers.

"N-no, Sir…" Patton's eyes flicker to the side, though not for long as Janus tugs his gaze forward once more.

"Then why do you constantly defy me?! Why do you choose to run away? You know how that makes me feel... you know how it deeply upsets me when you don't listen." The older Vampire allows his fingers to trail up and caress the younger's cheek, pulling back his hand, and forcing his palm against Patton's pale freckled skin. "You promise me not to leave the Hide again!"

He feels it. He feels the anger radiation off of his Master like something awful. It burrows deep within his stomach, his empty veins bubbling with heat and a surge of fury, but he knows it is not his own. This is Janus' and only Janus'.

Because what Patton himself feels...

If Vampires could cry, Patton's eyes would have been flooding with tears. But they can't, and they don't. Instead, he flinches away from his Master's touch, eyes low and filled with fear at just the thought of what may happen if Janus finds out about his Hoodied Human. The one with shadows under their eyes, dark swirls and roses drawn on their neck, the one whose name he had yet to find out. If Janus ever finds out that Patton was so close to coming into contact - almost outright revealing himself to the teen on the bench... there is only so much Patton can endure.

"It... it will not happen again, Master — I-I promise! I can assure you I —" Patton's words go unfinished as another slap with the back of Janus' hand hits him, grazing the corner of his lip but not enough to cause too much damage. "I'm sorry..."

"Are you listening? Patton, I am talking to you — forget it! You know where the Hide is, I expect to see you there when I get back from my feast." With that, Janus gives him one last glare before heading out into the night, ready to stalk his prey. But the young Vampire doesn't want to think of that right now, instead, he takes one last glance through the trees, shoulders sagging when his eyes don't find the Hoodied Human on the bench anymore.

He didn't know the human, so why does he feel so disappointed that they are not there anymore? He lost his chance to be a part of something — a part of that human's life... or as much of a life he could have with that human. Maybe it's too good to be true. Perhaps Janus is right. The Human world is a dangerous place, a place forbidden for Vampires like himself to enter.


End file.
